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After Hours at the Arcatina V: Operational Contamination

After Hours at the Arcatina - This article is part of a series.
Part 5: This Article

Midnight in the archive: Shiya catches Hiyori endlessly reorganizing shelves and rechecking her ‘contamination’ file. When Hiyori insists attachment is a distortion of judgment, Shiya counters that pretending to be untouched is the real contamination — ledgers don’t erase feelings. Hiyori admits some of them matter.

Poisoned Soil — entry V. Care enters the room disguised as administration.

Midnight. Archive alcove. Hiyori reorganizing a shelf that did not need reorganizing.

「また、何なに も整理せいり しない整理せいり をしているのね。」 — Reorganizing nothing again.

「考かんが えているだけ。」 — Thinking.

「それは整理法せいりほう ではないわ。」 — Not a filing method.

“It has served me adequately.”

「汚染おせん ファイルを確認かくにん する回数かいすう が増ふ えているわね。」 — You’ve been checking the contamination file more often.

That got Hiyori’s attention. The recalculation behind her eyes was visible to anyone fluent in Hiyori.

“Contamination remains the most accurate term.”

「愛着あいちゃく のことを?」 — For caring?

「判断はんだん の歪ゆが みのことを。」 — For distortion of judgment.

“And yet you haven’t removed the contaminated elements.”

「有用ゆうよう だから。」 — They remain useful.

「なんと魅力的みりょくてき な言葉ことば 。」 — What a charming word.

“Accurate.”

「臆病者おくびょうもの の言葉ことば よ。」 — Coward’s word.

That landed. Good.

“Would you prefer sentimental language?” Hiyori asked. “Shall I name operational failures softly so everyone feels better while the structure burns?”

「構造こうぞう が燃も えているのは、あなたが気き にかけているからじゃない。ただ、自己じこ 像ぞう を保たも てないほど綺麗きれい ではなくなっただけ。」 — The structure is not burning because you care. It is merely no longer clean enough to flatter your self-image.

Silence. Clean. Useful.

「大切たいせつ な人ひと がいる。」 — Some of them matter.

There it was. Not confession. Enough.

「そうね。」 — Yes.

「それが汚染おせん よ。」 — That is the contamination.

「違ちが う。それが事実じじつ 。汚染おせん は、影響えいきょう されないふりをすること。」 — No. That is the fact. The contamination is pretending you are untouched by it.

“You enjoy this.”

「非常ひじょう に。」 — Enormously.

「感情かんじょう を帳簿ちょうぼ に入い れても、消き えるわけじゃない。」 — Putting feelings in a ledger does not make them disappear.

「知し っているわ。だから何度なんど も確認かくにん してしまうの。」 — I know. That is why I keep checking the file.

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After Hours at the Arcatina - This article is part of a series.
Part 5: This Article